Random posts by random folks
My heart’s only in it half of the time,
the other half fast fades away
but then for a bit, a moment sublime,
it goes along with the charade.
A bittersweet vision dancing in light,
a vision undoubtedly you,
but fast does it fade and try as I might
my world fades to a shade of blue.
Some things are beyond
our understanding,
be it the questions of
What? Where? Why?
or
Who? When? How?
but there’s a certain beauty
in not knowing at times,
in being able to wonder
like a kid again
when life seems boring,
to be brought near
in unexpected ways
when it feels like the world
has pushed you away,
to not hide in fear
from the unknown
but to embrace it
like a new friend.
Even
these things
are beyond complete understanding
even if we didn’t
question it
and went along with it instead.
It was a rainy day
when it finally set in:
I don’t need to beat myself up
anymore
It could have been snowing,
the sun could have shined,
but the water felt good
over invisible bruises
as it washed away
confusion
Needle to thread
A new tale begins
Yet it’s the same
From the story
To the plot
And it’s end
The characters change
And the setting is different
But it seems the Author
Doesn’t want a positive change
And I don’t know why.
While the tears shed have been
Less, Love is ever evasive and
Illusive, one that mocks
Spits, and screams at my face
To stay down, that I’ll never have
The woman I want, not the one
I need. So the same old threads
Go forth, the same burgundy,
Navy, brown, and grey, weaving
The repeated pattern once again
And there’s nothing I can do
But watch beautiful melancholy
Color my eyes. How I want to
Set fire to the endless tapestry
Yet when I did it the last time
It returned as soon as it left
Leaving where it left off
And showing the multiple paths
To one endless, singular outcome
I remember the first time
I felt empathy,
it was troubling, a feeling
that I could not work out
as I read something
I had no right to read.
I, I, I,
that is not the word
to use when thinking of it
because it was
you.
You had written those words
in private,
in a place you thought
no one would ever find it.
You had to share your world
while stuck between
a stone-hearted fool and
a hard-headed one.
You were the one
who endured.
There was hurt in those words.
A hurt I knew.
A hurt I felt.
We were just kids with the same problem
but we didn’t know it yet.
I only knew empathy for once
because your words
said what I thought too
even if what you wrote
was also of me.
There’s a distance between you and I
A conundrum of being connected
Through a disconnected space
To see our voices yet not hear a sound
A feeling of touch yet lacking of contact
How I long to hold you, to press your skin against mine
A kiss to end a decade of loneliness
But these thoughts are antiquated acquaintances
A cold war between lust and love
Stuck in the in between without an end
So I wait for call of love, and a mutual embrace
Until then I lay adrift, in this dark blue sea
These moonlight glistened waters
With a song in my heart, waiting to be played
Like a radio in the ocean.
I just want to hold you tight
Tell you it will be alright
To help you right all former wrongs
And put the past where it belongs
But here I stand, apart from you,
Helpless, watching shades of blue
Running their course, hearing your cries,
But all is silent except the eyes
Most nights the drive home is fine,
no worries of the day
There’s a party after the party
but I hope I don’t
see you there Continue reading “The Party After the Party”
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